Yagyuu chan's Fanfiction
by melli-elle
Summary: One day, Yagyuu is late for tennis practice. And Niou wants to find out why. So with Marui and Renji's help, he sneeks into Yagyuu's dorm, only to find an odd web address, with even odder stuff. R and R!
1. Chapter 1

A/N So here it is finally. The long awaited for (mainly by Animeo) Yagyuu-chan's Fanfiction. If you have no idea where this came from, I suggest you go read Animeo's stories. They're a hoot. Check them out. But don't worry; they're not necessary to read if you want to read this. But you should definitely read my reviews of them. Their even more of a hoot then the actual story.

But don't tell Animeo that, because I'm actually lying… Anyway, on with the story!

* * *

The sun was shining, the birds were singing, the children were laughing…

And the Rikkai Dai tennis players were…

No, they weren't playing tennis! Whoever thought such a thing should be shot in the head.

Actually, they were sitting around on the tennis courts wondering why one of their main doubles' players weren't there yet.

In other words, Niou wouldn't let them start until Yagyuu arrived.

"'Mura-buchou! Can we please start?!" yelled Kirihara, his whiny face on. Niou turned to glare at him.

"Shut up! We can't start without Hiroshi!"

"Actually, you're the one who can't start without Hiroshi," pointed out Marui, who was consequently sitting on the ground eating cake. "I'm still not entirely sure why the rest of us can't."

"Because I said so, fatty!"

"Who you calling fatty?!"

"You, dumb but!"

A resounding slap was heard across the tennis courts.

Which one was slapped; well, I guess we'll never find out.

Ha! I lied. Ok, they both were slapped. Because Sanada has two hands, so it's possible. And I suppose if he didn't have two hands, he could have gotten Renji to do it. But then again, if he didn't have two hands, would he really be able to play tennis? No, which means he wouldn't have been vice-captain, which means that he wouldn't have been slapping them in the first place.

I'm glad we've gotten that out of the way.

Just as Niou was about to yell at Sanada for slapping him _(well, not really, because no one's stupid enough to yell at Sanada after he slaps you. He'll just slap you again. I think he likes slapping people…_

_Mizuki: Elle-san! Don't bring that into here!_

_Oh, right sorry… where were we? Oh I remember…)_ Yagyuu showed up at the tennis courts, looking at everyone sitting down.

"Why is everybody sitting down?" he asked.

"Niou," came the collective reply, as Niou ran up to his double's partner, grabbing the front of his shirt.

"Why were you so late, Hiroshi?" the silver haired boy asked, getting all up in Yagyuu's face.

"If you must know, Niou-kun, I was finishing my homework."

"What homework?" asked Niou again. "We're in the same class! Don't tell me we have homework that I've forgotten about again!"

"It wouldn't surprise me…" muttered Marui under his breath, as Niou let go of Yagyuu's shirt and went after Marui this time. But unfortunately for him _(and fortunately for everybody else)_ Yagyuu grabbed him before he could reign terror on Marui, and turned to Sanada.

"Can we start now?" he asked, causing everyone to face plant. Well, Sanada didn't, because he's too serious for that. And neither did Yukimura, because that would be troublesome for the whole team.

So after that they all went and practiced tennis _(surprise surprise)._ And after they finished, Niou began to nag Yagyuu again about the homework, at which point Yagyuu told him it wasn't really homework, just something he'd been working on for his own pleasure _(Mizuki: He he pleasure…_

_Get your mind out of the gutter!_

_Mizuki: Whatever…)_ and Niou promptly started to bug him so he would tell him what it was. But of course, Yagyuu refused. I mean, what kind of story would this be if Yagyuu just told him what was going on?

Not much of a story at all really.

But of course we won't leave Niou to suffer, so I'll keep writing now.

Now very curious, Niou seaked out his two partners in crime _(i.e. Renji and Marui)_ and explained his plan.

"O.k., I'm going to explain my plan."

"I think we got that," Marui muttered from his perch on Niou's bed.

"Yeah yeah, whatever fatty."

"Do you want me to help or not?"

"Oh get over yourself. I know you're just as curious about all this as I am."

As this was true, Marui had no relevant reply, so he kept quiet and waited for Niou to explain the plan.

"O.k., so here's the plan…"

"Just get on with it already!"

"Fine! Because I have the spare key to Yagyuu's dorm room, me and Marui will sneak in, look around for something suspicious, and Renji will keep look out. Got it?"

"That's your plan?!" exclaimed Marui. "That's so lame!"

"Do I really need to involve myself in this?" Renji asked, showing as much annoyance on his face as Renji possible could.

"Aren't you curious?" Niou asked, thinking that surely the data player would want to know everything.

"Not really," Renji muttered, looking at the ground. Well, his head was turned towards the ground. We're going to assume he isn't really looking at the ground because his eyes are most likely shut.

"Well you're going to help out anyway, otherwise I'll tell Sanada it was you who destroyed his hat _(refer to Animeo's Womanless Pageant)_."

"You wouldn't…"

"Was it really?" asked Marui, who obviously hadn't been paying attention at the time.

"No, but I can prove that it was."

"But how can you prove that it was if it wasn't?"

Niou looked at him as if to say "I'm Niou!" Marui shrugged, and let it slide.

"Fine, I'll help. What do I have to do?"

* * *

-Time Lapse-

* * *

"O.k., I just have one question," asked Marui, as he scrounged around Yagyuu's room for anything that would look remotely out of place.

"It better not be something stupid…" Niou said, rummaging through Yagyuu's school bag.

"Why do you have Yagyuu's spare room key in the first place?"

Niou looked up at him, giving the look that says 'I'm Niou!' But then he thought about what Marui was implying, and threw a note book at him. Marui moved, and the book hit the wall before promptly falling open on the bed. Marui bent over it, and looked at what was written there.

"Fanfiction dot net? What's that?" he asked, as Niou moved to his side.

"How would I know?"

"It's some sort of website address…" Marui said, looking at it again, before showing Niou.

"Well, let's look it up!" Niou said, grabbing the notebook off of Marui and jumping over to Yagyuu's desk, where his laptop sat. He typed in the address, and up popped a site a blue line up the top that said '' on it, and a picture of a white haired cartoon character with a heading of 'Yagyuu-chan' at the top of the page (for the pic, check out Animeo's page LOL!).

"Is… is that you, Niou?" Marui asked, pointing at the picture, snickering.

"Shut up, Fatty!" he said, scrolling down the page. There was a bunch of random crap that Niou couldn't really be bothered reading, before he came to a link under the heading 'Stories'. It had the heading 'Niou's Worst Day'.

"Uh… huh?" Marui asked, as Niou clicked on it.

"I don't know, but let's find out…" he said as the screen changed to another page…

**'Niou's Worst Day**

**A/N For the record, I really am Yagyuu Hiroshi. I know no one will believe me when I say this, because I'm sure that everyone says this. But this did actually happen.**

**Well, most of it…**

**It hadn't really been going to well that day for Niou Masaharu.'**

"He he, that's you."

"Shut up, fatty."

**'He'd already fell down the stairs on his way to training, got slapped by Sanada twice, spilt his orange juice on his pants, and got to class realizing that he'd left his homework on his desk. Needless to say, he was quite upheavaled by the time he got to lunch.'**

"What does Upheaveled mean?"

"Didn't I just tell you to shutup?"

**'His best friend, Yagyuu Hiroshi, watched as he plomped down at the table next to him.'**

Marui began to chuckle.

"What are you laughing at?" Niou asked.

"I can't believe he actually wrote plomped."

"Oh be quiet. And besides, I didn't plomp. It was a very dignified sitting down."

"Oh yeh, this actually happened, didn't it?"

"Shutup…"

**' "Niou-kun, what's wrong?" Yagyuu asked, eyeing his friend's disheveled state. Niou glared at his friend, before promptly putting his head in his pudding.'**

Marui cracked up laughing.

"I remember that!"

"SHUTUP!"

**'Yagyuu was about to say something when a hand came out of no where and pushed Niou's head further into the pudding.**

**"Now who's the fatty, ai?" said Marui, as he plopped down beside Niou. "Eating your food too fast can't be that good for you."'**

"Hey look! It's me!"

"Don't make me say it again…"

**'Niou lifted his head, chocolate pudding dripping from his hair. The other regulars were trying to hold their laughter in, except for Yagyuu and Sanada. Niou stood, still glaring at Marui, before stomping off. Yagyuu was about to follow when Niou yelled out to him 'And don't even think about following me, Hiroshi!"'**

"You really were having a bad day, weren't you?"

"Yeh, and you certainly didn't help. But it is interesting to read about it from Yagyuu's point of view."

**'Niou left the lunch room, unaware of his follower. He made his way to the bathroom, trying to rinse out his hair, and was about to scream when he turned around a collided with Marui.**

**"Stupid fatty!" yelled Niou, grabbing the front of Marui's shirt.**

**"Stupid trickster!" yelled Marui, getting all in Marui's face. Just as Niou was about to yell something else, Marui leant in and kissed him full on the lips.'**

"WHAT?!"

"THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN!"

"WHAT THE HELL!?"

**'At first Niou didn't respond, but after he realized what was happening, he began to kiss Marui back.'**

"WHAT THE HELL!? I WOULD NEVER KISS HIM BACK!"

"WELL I WOULD NEVER KISS YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!"

**'They finally pulled apart when the sound of a camera was heard, and they both turned around to see Kirihara poking his head out of a toilet door, camera posed. Blood rushed to both boy's faces, and they rushed after the ace with every intention to kill him.**

**But to Niou, it didn't seem like such a bad day after all.'**

Both Niou and Marui sat there in silence. They didn't say anything for a few seconds, just stared at the screen.

"Kirihara did take a picture…" Niou started.

"And it did look like we were kissing…" Marui added.

"BUT WE DIDN'T ACTUALLY KISS!" yelled both of them at the same time as the door to the dorm opened, and they both turned around to find Yagyuu standing there. Niou jumped up, and for the second time that day, grabbed Yagyuu by the shirt.

"Hiroshi! What's the meaning of this?!" he yelled.

"Yeh!" added Marui. "How did you know that happened anyway? Did Kirihara show you the pic!?" His face showed that he was going to throttle him if he had.

"No. I spied on you. What was written on there was what I actually imagined happening."

Both boys stared at him.

"That's…" Niou started.

"… just weird." Marui finished. They turned to look at each other, before making gagging sounds.

"I'm going to go find Jackal. Niou, knock some sense into your doubles partner," Marui said, stomping out of the room. Niou turned to glare at Yagyuu.

"What is fan fiction, anyway?" he asked, pointing at the laptop. Yagyuu moved to sit at the desk, turning the laptop towards him.

"I was online and I found a new anime. I'm not sure how, but it surrounds Seigaku and their tennis journey."

"That sounds lame."

"It's actually well written, though there should be more Rikkai Dai."

"You mean we're actually in it?"

"Yep. And Fan fiction is fiction that is based around a certain tv show, book, game, the like. This site is somewhere where people can post any fan fiction they've written. There's over 400 for Prince Of Tennis."

"What a lame name."

"The story you just read was my first, but the reviews I got for it has compelled me to write more."

"MORE?!"

"Yes. My next story is going to be based on Hyotei. That's where I was today; trying to find something to base it on."

"That's so stupid. I mean seriously, why would anyone want to do that?"

"You want to help?"

"I thought you'd never ask."

* * *

Elle: And there it is! Finally!

Mizuki: I'm not in it yet…

Elle: Don't worry, as if I'd leave you out.

Mizuki: I'm just glad Ishida isn't allowed to be in the story.

Elle: Well, it isn't a Bleach story, so it wouldn't make any sense.

Mizuki: You realize the only one any of this will make sense to is Animeo-san, right?

Elle: I can only hope… By the way, if anyone's wondering about Mizuki, he's here because he never gets enough recognition, so I am polite and allow him to invade my reviews… and now I guess my stories aswell. Anyway, I'll keep writing the next chapter, which is pretty much written in my head anyway. And yes, Animeo, it is exactly what you've been waiting for, I mentioned it in my last review:P.

So please read and Review. This is only going to get better, and I'd appreciate ideas for further Yagyuu fanfiction aswell.

Till next chapter!

Elle


	2. Chapter 2

A/N You know, I've been trying to figure out when I became so obsessed with the Platinum pair. It's not by reading awesomely awesomely story about them like it was the Dirty Pair, and it wasn't because it was so blaitently obvious, like nearly every other pair… I think it was because at the start, when I started writing Stuck, for instance, I didn't think that much of them. But then I actually took the time to sit back and pay attention to them and realised they had WAY more personality then Marui and Jackal, who were my preferred Rikkai Dai doubles pair at the time. So this chapter is yet again dedicated to animeo, mainly because I am not that much a fan of the main pairing in this chapter. And it was hard for me to write, and animeo helped with it. But it was such a good idea line, that I had to use it! So here goes.

* * *

Yagyuu took the remote from Niou and clicked the button that stopped the video they were watching.

"Wow…" Niou turned to glare at his friend.

"That's all you can say?! Wow?!"

"Well, when you skipped out on practice to go to Hyotei, I really didn't think you'd come back with something this…"

"Good?"

"O.k., now your just sounding hentai."

"Oh, like you don't like it."

It was Yagyuu's turn to glare. "I am not Sanada-kun, no matter how much I know you want me to be."

If Yagyuu hadn't moved, he would have been slapped in the face for that.

"Do you want my help on further missions or not?"

Yagyuu looked down at the tape again. "Well, if their all gonna end like that, then that's a yes." He turned back to look at Niou. "But try not to make it look like your spying on them again, ok?"

"But where's the fun in that?" he asked, then frowned. "That reminds me, how come Renji never alerted me and Marui when we were searching through you're room?"

Yagyuu shrugged. "Renji's a great source when it comes to juicy gossip. Especially when it comes to Seigaku. That data friend of his is a definite asset."

"More like a definite asse…" muttered Niou, before gathering up his school bag. "Where to next?"

"Well, I've got to finish this one now, but I'm quite sure it's going to get quite a response."

"O.k. But give me the web address for it when it's finished, will you?" he asked, as he opened the door. Yagyuu looked up at him.

"Why's that?" he asked, and Niou smiled.

"Hiroshi, this is me. If I told you every little prank I was going to play, it wouldn't be any fun, now would it?" he asked, shutting the door behind him. Yagyuu turned back to his computer and began to type, now slightly worried about his odd friend.

"This is not going to end well…"

* * *

"YUUSHI!" came an extremely loud voice through the Hyotei's locker rooms. The three people who were sitting in the locker rooms turned abruptly at the voice to find a very irate Gakuto standing at the door, looking around. Upon seeing only Ootori, Hiyoshi and Kabaji standing around, he looked around. "Where's Yuushi?" he asked, and Ootori turned to look at Hiyoshi, who shrugged. Ootori turned back to Gakuto.

"We don't know, Mukahi-sempai," he answered in an apologetic tone. Gakuto groaned in response, before collapsing on the bench. Then Hiyoshi turned to look at Ootori.

"Wait, didn't Atobe say something about all the seniors having a meeting today?" Hiyoshi asked, and the Ootori gasped.

"Oh! That's right! I was wondering why Shishido-san didn't meet me after class like he always does…" he said thoughtfully, causing the other two to look at him. (I know I keep only writing two people here, but seriously, has anyone seen Kabaji do anything besides stand there?) Ootori looked back at them, confused. "What?"

"Never mind," said Hiyoshi, shaking his head. Then he looked up at Gakuto. "Wait, Mukahi-sempai, why aren't you at the meeting?"

"BECAUSE! I GOT A REALLY WEIRD EMAIL THAT SENT ME TO AN ENGLISH SITE THAT I NEED YUUSHI TO READ FOR ME!"

"Wait, you got that email to?" Ootori asked suddenly, looking up from whatever he was doing. Gakuto turned to him.

"Yes! Can you read it?"

Ootori shrugged. "I could only read bits of it, but it seemed to be some kind of story."

Gakuto jumped. "I noticed that too! And it had our names in it!"

"Wait, is this the email from Niou-kun?" Hiyoshi asked, and both Ootori and Gakuto looked at him.

"I didn't recognise the email, and it wasn't signed," Ootori said thoughtfully, rubbing his chin.

"Same. I ran all my computer scans through it to make sure it wasn't a virus first, but I was too curious not to open it. Then I couldn't even read it!"

"Well, I didn't get the email, but I did get one saying for my team mates to look out for emails from him, and he signed it. So I'm assuming he sent it."

"Wow, your so smart Hiyoshi," Gakuto said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. He leant back against the locker as the door opened a second time, this time to find Oshitari arguing with Atobe, Shishido following grudgingly behind them.

"Yuushi!" yelled Gakuto, jumping up to glomp his doubles partner, who broke off his argument with Atobe to swiftly un-attach Gakuto from him. "I need you to read this email I got."

"We all got one," Ootori added, somehow finding his way to stand beside Shishido. "It's from Niou-kun over in Rikkai Dai."

"Yes, we know," muttered Shishido under his breath. "And all I can say is we are so lucky that half of us can't read English…"

"What? What does that mean, Shishido? WHAT DID THE WEBSITE SAY!?" Gakuto asked, staring from each of the taller boys standing around him. Shishido looked at Yuushi, who shrugged. Gakuto hissed at them. "If you don't tell me, I'm just going to translate it online anyway," Gakuto informed them, glaring them down in chose this moment to but in.

"As amusing as this all is bound to end up, Ore-sama promises to use his laptop to translate the story so you can read it. AFTER practice."

Gakuto groaned at this, but nodded anyway. Oshitari looked stricken, glaring daggers at Atobe like it was his job.

"Atobe…" he started, but Atobe just ignored him and began to get ready for practice.

After practice (yes, I realise this story really doesn't look at practice much, but if it did, that'd be boring, wouldn't it?), all the regulars congregated in the locker room again (don't ask why, cause even I'm not sure of that one). Atobe pulled out his laptop, and after pressing a few buttons, he handed it over to Gakuto.

"There you go. Be awed by Ore-sama's translating skills," he said, flicking his hair back. Gakuto groaned, before grabbing the laptop.

**_'Oshitari's Secret'_**

"Huh?" asked Ootori, who was sitting on a bench next to Shishido as they listened to Gakuto read it.

"That must be the title."

"Keep reading!" yelled Jirou, suddenly awake and listening.

"No, please don't," muttered Oshitari, glancing off at the side every once in a while.

_**'He wasn't sure how long he could keep this up. How long had it been? Four moths? Four years?'**_

"Four years? What the hell?!" Oshitari yelled, jumping up, and throwing himself at the laptop in a very un-Oshitari-like manner.

"Yuushi!" yelled Gakuto, pulling the laptop out of his range.

"Oshitari, Ore-sama demands you allow Gakuto to read the story."

"Wait, you've read it?!" asked Gakuto, turning from Oshitari to Atobe. They looked at each other, before looking back.

"Well, we got the email too," replied Shishido.

"Just keep reading," muttered Hiyoshi, looking down at the laptop.

**_'He couldn't keep on with this much longer. Of course, he knew, but how long would he stick around when he got sick of it? Not long, Oshitari knew._**

**_"Yuushi!"_**

**_There came that familiar voice. One Oshitari had come to hate and love at the same time.'_**

"Huh?" Gakuto asked, not sure what to think of that.

"Is this fictional?" Ootori asked slowly, turning to look at Shishido, who shrugged.

"Ask Oshitari, not me," he hissed, glaring at Oshitari. Gakuto looked at Oshitari expectantly, but ignored it. Gakuto turned back to the laptop.

_**'Hyotei's tensai turned towards the sound of the voice, only to find his boyfriend racing into the locker room, as energetic as always.**_

_**"Yuushi, where's Jirou?" the red head asked, jumping over to the tensai as he jumped around some more. "Atobe's looking for him, and I can't find him anywhere! Where is he? Do you know?"'**_

"It… it is real…" Gakuto muttered, handing the laptop to Ootori. "You read."

_**'Oshitari tried to concentrate on his boyfriend's anxious face, but found it hard.**_

_**"I, think he's in the maths room. Taki said he had fallen asleep there second period and no one bothered to move him." **_

_**Gakuto stomped off, muttering to himself "And no on thought to tell Atobe…"**_

_**Oshitari sighed as the acrobat left, closing the door to the locker room as he did so. Oshitari turned to look at the door to the shower…'**_

"Hiyoshi-kun? Where are you going?" Ootori asked, as Hiyoshi stood up.

"Bathroom," he muttered quietly, not looking at the rest of the team as he exited to locker room.

"Wow, dei ja vu…" Shishido muttered, glaring at Oshitari, who ignored him.

_**'He wondered if he had heard who had entered. The tensai knew how he felt about the acrobat, and not just for obvious reasons either. He hated him with a vengeance, and Oshitari still wasn't sure why. He stood and walked towards the shower doors. He opened them, and seeing the…'**_

"Uhhh…" said Ootori.

"Keep reading, Choutarou," said Shishido forcefully.

"You sure?" asked Ootori and Shishido nodded. Ootori looked back at the laptop, and kept reading.

_**'the brown hair falling against the shower walls as Hiyoshi sat against it, head in hands.**_

_**"You shouldn't stay in there so long," Oshitari said quietly. "You'll get wrinkles."**_

_**Hiyoshi looked up at the tensai, a glare covering his face that didn't quite reach his eyes. The look in his eyes caused his heart to jump a beat. **_

_**"Please don't look at me like that, Piyo-chan."**_

_**"Is it safe for you to call me that here?" he asked in a low voice, standing and grabbing for his towel. Oshitari let out a sigh, before turning back towards the door.**_

_**"Sorry," he muttered, but just as he was about to turn the handle, he felt to wet arms wrap around his jersey covered torso. **_

_**"You're still wet, piyo-chan."**_

_**"Don't leave just yet," he muttered, and Oshitari heard the underlying tone in his voice as he wrapped his own arms around those below his.**_

_**"Don't worry, I won't leave just yet."**_

_**Yagyuu-chan: I'm thinking of making this more then a one-shot. It depends on reviews I get, so if you want it continued, please review?'**_

The Hyotei regulars sat in complete silence as Ootori finished reading, and Atobe took his laptop back.

"Is it…" Gakuto started, and Jirou started cracking up laughing.

"Of course it isn't! Silly Gaku-chan, Yuushi loves you!" he yelled, laughing as he exited the locker room. Everyone watched him, clearly thinking he had gone insane, except they never said it aloud, because they knew Atobe was in the room. Gakuto looked at Yuushi, before storming out. Yuushi quickly followed him, not looking back at the group still in the locker room. Ootori sat there, a tissue to his nose from the sudden nose bleed. Shishido sat next to him, shaking his head muttering something like 'it wasn't even graphic. He's never gonna want to do anything.' Atobe sat in complete silence, which for him was definitely a feat. Kabaji seemed to be copying Atobe. Or maybe it was the other way around. We'll never know. And just for some randomness, Taki walked into the room, looking around, and realising he didn't really belong there, walked out again, causing everyone to pretty much forget what happened, and get on with their boring-some-what-exciting-because-of-tennis lives.

* * *

Outside, Gakuto was storming away from Oshitari, who was trying to keep up with the acrobat.

"Gakuto…"

"Yuushi! Stop it! Is it true or not?"

"I will not lie to you.

"Then what the hell have you been doing for the last year or longer if it wasn't lieing?"

That stumped Oshitari, who hung his head.

"I never lied…"

"Oh right, just stretching the truth a bit, right? Whatever, baka," he yelled, before running off again.

"Wait! Please, Gakuto! Couldn't we even try a threesome once?"

* * *

Niou and Yagyuu watched from near by bushes. Yagyuu held his hand over Niou's mouth to keep him from cracking up laughing.

"Definetely unexpected. I'm glad I left it unfinished," he muterred to himself. He pulled out his phone, and began to text someone as Niou read over his shoulder.

"Why are you texting Renji?" he asked, and Yagyuu shrugged.

"I told you before, he's working with me," Yagyuu informed him.

"Wait, he's known about this from the start?!" Niou whispered loudly.

"Of course. I told you before, he's very good for information."

Niou looked perplexed, before putting it together in his mind. All he could picture was Yagyuu and Renji working closely together to help put the last fiction together, and he glared at the golf player.

"You aren't doing what Oshitari is doing, are you?"

"Yes, Niou-kun. Renji and I have been having hot, steamy sex behind your back for weeks now," he said, so seriously that Niou actually believed him.

"Hiroshi!" he yelled, and then began to think about it. "Wait that's hot."

"Niou-kun, I was joking."

"I'm not."

"I noticed."

"Can we?"

Yagyuu raised an eyebrow, before standing up and walking away.

"Wait! Hiroshi, come back! It'd be hot!" he said, chasing after him.

* * *

Elle: Ta da! I was going to put in a mind theatre, but I knew that'd be too much like animeo's, so I didn't.

Mizuki: I am going to be in this story, right?

Elle: Yes, Mizuki. Don't worry. But not for a couple more chapters. And Fuji will be in that chapter aswell.

Mizuki: Wait, he's not going to kill me, right?

Elle: Kill you? Why would I do that? That would be unkind.

Mizuki: You were unkind to Gakuto.

Elle: But for all my dirty pair loving, he'll get over it.

Mizuki: Probably.

Elle: Oh, and I should probably apologise for the lack of funny in Yagyuu's fiction. It wasn't meant to be, the rest was… hell, I'm not even sure the rest of it was. But I'm sure people will tell me otherwise. Anyway, R and R!


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** This was actually prompted by asking my sister for random words, and she said 'Gold, cheese, lubricant and hair straightner' Yes, my sister's as strange as me. Plus, it didn't actually accur to me the pun of the words 'Golden Cheese' Until I finished... get it? 'Golden Pair?' Funny, right?... I'll shut up now and let you get back to reading.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Prince of Tennis… then again, I don't own fan fiction either! I'm so low…

* * *

**Chapter 3**

"You should put that there… oh! And put that there!"

"Niou-kun, could you just let me sort it?"

"But I know that would be better there.

"No, you hope that it would be better there, because you want to make them cringe a bit more…"

"Oh, and you don't? You were looking…"

Niou was cut off as Yagyuu's phone rang, Renji's ring tone making him jump. Yagyuu stopped typing on his laptop and picked up the mobile, opened it, and put it to his ear.

"Renji? Ah, very well… No, I was in the middle of writing Oshitari's… Oh, really? Yes, that is interesting… You want to send out the copies?" Yagyuu turned to look at Niou. "Very well, I'll explain it to him… No, of course. This is definitely worth it… Right. I'll email them to you. Later."

Yagyuu turned to Niou, a surprisingly Niou-like smirk on his face.

"Let's have some fun, neh?"

* * *

Kikumaru Eiji collapsed onto the ground.

"Oishi! Tezuka's so harsh today! What happened?!"

Oishi sighed. "It's ok, Eiji. I'm sure it's nothing."

"Oishi! Kikumaru! Twenty more laps for laying down!" Tezuka's voice yelled, causing Eiji to face plant.

"Don't worry, Eiji. I'll talk to him about this."

Oishi walked over to Tezuka, Eiji watching intently. It was a few seconds before Tezuka pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket, handed it to Oishi, and Eiji watched as his eyes widened as he read the paper. Oishi looked over at Eiji, before handing back the note. He walked back over to Eiji, holding out his hand.

"You don't have to run the laps. Go stretch with Fuji, I've got to talk to Tezuka," he said, and Eiji nodded, a little confused before going back over to Fuji. Oishi walked back to Tezuka.

"When will they find out?" he asked, running his hand through his hair.

"When they get back to their lockers."

* * *

The last two in the locker room that afternoon where Oishi and Tezuka. Everyone was acting normal; well, nearly everyone.

"Nya? What's this?" Eiji asked, holding up a piece of paper.

"It's a piece of paper," Fuji said, pointing at it. "I have one too."

"Me too!" said Taka.

"Yeh, I got one too!" yelled Momo.

"Fssshhhh…" added Kaido.

"Hai," finished Echizen.

"Mine says **_'Read this when Sadaharu lets you.'_** Whose Sadaharu?" Eiji asked, looking around at his team mates.

"That would be Inui, Eiji," Fuji said with a smile, turning to look at Inui, who inwardly gulped at the full force of Fuji's gaze.

"But who calls him Sadaharu?" Taka asked, a confused look on his face.

"Only one person. Yanagi Renji," Fuji replied, still glaring at Inui.

"I suppose I should just let you all read it, then…" he said, and Fuji nodded, happy. "But first, I also have to tell you, if you do not believe what is written, we have photographic proof."

A gasp was heard at that, and everyone turned to look at Oishi and Tezuka, who were still standing in the door way. Fuji began to chuckle.

"Oh, I see now," he said cheerily, picking up his paper, and opening it. "May I read it aloud, Inui?"

"Of course, Fuji."

"Good."

**_'Golden Cheese'_**

"It's a title!" exclaimed Eiji.

"A story?" asked Momo, and Inui nodded, as Fuji continued to read.

_**'It started as a normal day. Just like any other, really. But little did these people know, it was about to get seriously dangerous.'**_

"Nya, Fujiko, maybe someone else should read the story. You're being scary."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Eiji. I'll try harder not to, ok?"

"Ok!"

**_'Tezuka Kunimitsu was walking home from tennis practice, with his best friend Oishi, like he did every day._**

**_He would go home, finish his homework, eat dinner, take a shower, await the phone call from Oishi, his vice captain, and then his boyfriend's evening call, which came at exactly eight every night.'_**

"Wow, this is surprisingly accurate," said Fuji, smiling at Inui, who began to cringe again.

"Neh, Fuji, how do you know that?"

"Oh, never mind, Eiji."

_**'But today something went wrong. Oishi wasn't waiting for him by the gates while he locked up the locker room.**_

_**He checked around the school, but couldn't find him anywhere. Suddenly worried, he rang his boyfriend on his cell phone.**_

_**"Hello?" answered the other end.**_

_**"I can't find Oishi," Tezuka replied. There was a chuckle to be heard from the other end of the phone.**_

_**"Do you want me to walk you home?" the voice asked, and Tezuka nodded, before realising the voice couldn't hear him, and added**_

_**"Yes please."**_

_**After receiving his answer, he hung up the phone, and waited. Soon enough, up walked his boyfriend, the honey haired tensai from his tennis team.'**_

"FUJIKO!"

"FUJI-SEMPAI!?"

"FUJI-KUN?!"

"Saa… Inui, this is quite an interesting story you have going here."

"Photos, Fuji, photos."

"Very well. I will continue."

_**' "Neh, Tezuka, did something happen?" Fuji asked, and Tezuka shrugged.**_

_**"I'm not sure. Usually if he can't make it he'd ring me," Tezuka informed him, as they began to walk towards Tezuka's house.**_

_**"Are you afraid of walking home by yourself or something?" Fuji joked, and Tezuka sighed.**_

_**"No. I'm just worried about Oishi," he replied, and Fuji nodded, before pulling on Tezuka's hand, and pulling him into a park.**_

_**"I have cheese," he said, pulling cheese out of his back pack. It was cheese; only it was gold.**_

_**"Gold cheese?" Tezuka asked, and Fuji nodded.**_

_**"You should try some, Tezuka. It's very tasty. Inui gave it to me today. I let Oishi have a bite aswell; he seemed to like it."'**_

"Nya! Fuji, what did you feed to Oishi?!"

"Shall I keep reading so you can find out, Eiji?"

"YES!"

"Very well, then."

_**'Tezuka eyed the cheese questioningly. A cheese that Inui made… for Fuji. It was like double taboo. It was one thing to eat something Inui had made, and to add on top of that something was made for Fuji… Tezuka wasn't sure he could take it. But Fuji was looking at him so pleadingly, his eyes open; he never had been able to say no to those eyes.**_

_**Tezuka was just about to take a bite when…'**_

_**"Mada mada dane."**_

_**"O'chibi! That's what it says in the story!"**_

_**"He knows, Eiji, he's reading it too," informed Taka, and Eiji looked down at his feet.**_

_**' "Mada mada dane. Buchou, you're letting you're guard down," came a voice, and the other two turned around to see Echizen.**_

_**"What do you mean, Echizen?" Tezuka asked, raising an eyebrow.**_

_**"Fuji-sempai just said that he fed some of that to Oishi, after he didn't meet you at the gate to walk you home," Echizen supplied, and Tezuka blanched, before turning to glare at Fuji.**_

_**"Tezu-chan!" came a loud voice, and all four of them turned to see a slightly muscular girl standing at the edge of the park with long blonde hair, a deep purple mini skirt, and a black top that says 'Swallow'. Tezuka started choking, Fuji chuckled, and Echizen stared wide eyed.**_

_**"No way…" muttered Echizen, before turning to his sempai. "I think I'll be going home before I see someone else in drag."**_

_**He wondered off, and the other two continued to gawk at the 'girl'.**_

_**"Tezu-chan, you're being called," said Fuji, still chuckling.**_

_**"Fuji! What did you put in that cheese?!"**_

_**"What? I told you, Inui made it, not me."**_

_**Tezuka walked up to the girl, snapping his fingers in front of her face.**_

_**"Snap out of it, Oishi!" he yelled, and Oishi seemed to snap out of his odd stance, then he looked down at himself, before looking back up at Tezuka.**_

_**"Tezuka, where's the red car?"**_

_**Tezuka raised an eyebrow, looking back at his vice captain.**_

_**"Red car?"**_

_**"Yeh, you know, toot toot chugger chugger…"**_

_**"You mean the song from that English children's band?"**_

_**"Yeh! The Waggles!"**_

_**"I think you mean the wiggles, said Fuji from behind them with the smirk.**_

_**"Yeh! Them! Tezuka, you can be the one with the yellow shirt, cause he's so obviously the leader, Fuji, you can be the one with the blue shirt, because he's always playing tricks, I'll be the one with the red shirt, because he's the calm one…" he probably would of finished, but he fell asleep on the ground instead.**_

_**"Maybe he should be the purple one…" Fuji said with a chuckle. Tezuka turned around, glaring at his boyfriend, before picking up Oishi, and putting him over his shoulder. "Carry him like that, and people will think you're kidnapping a girl."**_

_**"Or they'll think I'm saving my best friend from pure torture of waking up in a park in girls clothes."**_

_**"Oh well," Fuji said with a sigh, as Tezuka began to walk away. "Neh, Tezuka, didn't you want to try some of the cheese?"**_

_**Tezuka was gone before Fuji even had time to blink.**_

_**"Interesting reaction," Inui muttered from behind a tree, and Fuji turned to him.**_

_**"You didn't think he'd dress up in girls clothes?"**_

_**"No, I didn't think Tezuka would be willing to destroy his reputation by carrying a 'girl' home like that."**_

_**Fuji pulled out his camera. "Shall we?"**_

_**Inui nodded. "We shall."'**_

"INUI! I WANT THOSE PICTURES!" yelled Eiji, rushing at Inui, causing Oishi to gasp.

"Eiji, no! I want to burn them!"

"Fuji!"

"Yes, Tezuka?"

"You won't be allowed at my house for a month."

"Neh, Tezuka, you don't really mean…

"Two months."

"What about my house?"

"Three months."

"I'll go to Atobe…"

"Four months."

Taka, Echizen, Kaido and Momo all watched the upraising silently, wishing they could just escape the locker room unharmed. They tried to sneak out, and they were nearly at the door, when Kaido noticed something on the ground. Kaido bent down to pick it up, and looking at it, promptly fainted. The whole room went silent, and when Momo went to look at the picture, only to find a masculine female with long blonde hair, a purple mini skirt, and a black top that said 'Swallow'.

And looking very sexy.

* * *

"Ah. Is that so, Renji? Interesting reaction. Yes, I've put it on the site. Yes, I'm going back to working on Oshitari's secret. No, we'll hit somewhere else… St Rudolph, perhaps? Very good. O.k, I'll talk to you later." Yagyuu hanged up the mobile. "Now, where were we?"

"No, Hiroshi! Don't put it there!"

"I told you, that's where it goes!"

"That's not where it goes, Hiroshi! Ouch!"

* * *

Somewhere far away, Fuji Syuusuke looked down at his laptop, copying an address of a piece of paper into the address bar.

"Fanfiction… neh, this should be fun."

* * *

A/N: There we go! Finally, my Seigaku chapter! A little different from the other two, but still! I hope you still like itJ Till next time!

Mizuki: Next time's me, right?

It might be you, it might be the second chapter of Oshitari's secret! Only time (and reviews) will tell!


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